Running

As a working Mom I feel like I am constantly running, making lists, crossing things off, planning my next move, forgetting something, cleaning, cooking, hugging kids, scolding kids, working out, and trying not to fail at my job.  I know mentally it is completely impossible to be the best at everything.
That is why several years ago I allowed myself to not be perfect!  Sounds simple but it was hard to do.  It took daily practice - not laziness- but practice.

Now, I can look at a messy room and think the following:
 "Ami, you should clean that room.  It would look really nice when you are done.  You worked all day and didn't get a chance to clean so you should pick up a broom and get to it. On second thought, you should walk into the next room and give your teenager a kiss.  He might really need one!  Oh, and you should tell him you are proud of him and not let him get away with NOT kissing you back.  And, you should ask him how things are going-don't take "GOOD" for an answer.  Tell him how much you care to know about his day and share your beliefs with him.  Tickle him, hold him, offer to play a game.  Actually, the kid is more important than the room and one day soon he is going to be gone."
 

I am all for a clean house and my kids certainly have chores however, I can't do it all week after week after week.  It is impossible.  I tried to be perfect for most of my twenties and got my act together (finally) in my mid thirties.  I am soon to be 40 and I am finally growing up.  I finally know that I already am who I was meant to be and that cleaning my house does not make me a good wife. And getting my kids to do all of their chores perfectly does not make me a good mother.

I have to say, I sleep a lot better knowing I talked to each of my kids during the day and said family prayer with them.  Talking to my husband is harder because we are so crazy busy spending precious moments with our kids.  However, we do hang out on the weekends and we are still madly in love - even if I no longer make the bed.

I feel like I am running around now loving others rather than running around worrying about what chores I didn't get done.  I have found a lot of freedom in my new running method and one day I will look back and only remember moments spent with my family rather than a well scrubbed wooden floor.

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